Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize