id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
