I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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