i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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