I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
