i was born a porn star she said
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
