You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Randomize
