my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
