i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
She needs sedatives and a leash
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
