I'm so fucking centered right now
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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