Texts From Last Night

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  (317): View more from Indiana

  wrigley field is MILF paradise

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  (317): wrigley field is MILF paradise http://tfl.nu/g3u8
  Replies (6) Good night (1152) Bad night (393) Order T-Shirt
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  (209): View more from California

  do you want me to make hamburgers?

  (541): View more from Oregon

  i'm vegan

  (209): View more from California

  i'll put lettuce on them

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  (209): do you want me to make hamburgers? (541): i'm vegan (209): i'll put lettuce on them http://tfl.nu/hb72
  Replies (37) Good night (7438) Bad night (894)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud

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  (863): just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud http://tfl.nu/54kw
  Replies (11) Good night (4764) Bad night (705)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.

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  (803): I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene. http://tfl.nu/fj0l
  Replies (38) Good night (6179) Bad night (1855) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.

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  (925): Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here. http://tfl.nu/dbsi
  Replies (9) Good night (3452) Bad night (883) Order T-Shirt
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  (903): View more from Texas

  He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.

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  (903): He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan. http://tfl.nu/b8b3
  Replies (3) Good night (1963) Bad night (589) Order T-Shirt
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house

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  (573): i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house http://tfl.nu/7ii5
  Replies (3) Good night (1552) Bad night (462) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.

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  (405): All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before. http://tfl.nu/9m83
  Replies (9) Good night (475) Bad night (1254)
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  (760): View more from California

  This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes

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  (760): This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes http://tfl.nu/v44x
  Replies (2) Good night (1085) Bad night (434) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike

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  (513): It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike http://tfl.nu/56lf
  Replies (6) Good night (333) Bad night (698) Order T-Shirt
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.

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  (803): One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big. http://tfl.nu/i8v0
  Replies (10) Good night (902) Bad night (355) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower

  (1-281): View more from Texas

  This could be the definition of living by yourself

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  (281): No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower (1-281): This could be the definition of living by yourself http://tfl.nu/oh63
  Replies (2) Good night (897) Bad night (290) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee

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  (717): dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee http://tfl.nu/bnsi
  Replies (10) Good night (352) Bad night (836) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch

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  (440): No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch http://tfl.nu/as9g
  Replies (1) Good night (340) Bad night (106) Order T-Shirt
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.

  (1-320): View more from Minnesota

  The apocalypse has arrived.

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  (320): For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment. (1-320): The apocalypse has arrived. http://tfl.nu/kypn
  Replies (1) Good night (333) Bad night (142) Order T-Shirt

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