Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?