Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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