well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
