i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
