Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
