i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I fill condoms, not promises.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
