I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
