everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Randomize
