Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Let's paint friendship bongs
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
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