I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
