I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Randomize