there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
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