"it" just moved
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
