Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize