I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
