Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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