You work out of a Hotel?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
