That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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