quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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