I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
