wakey wakey hands off snakey
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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