the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
