i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Randomize
