I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
operation harelip BJ is a go
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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