the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
