Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
