Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Randomize
