He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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