You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize