Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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