I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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