I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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