how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
