So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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