Your mouth is God's brothel.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
