You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
