Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
