you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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