hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
