Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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